Friday, May 10, 2013

I Hate Travis

Cover of "Why Does It Always Rain on Me"
Because you're shit.
Let's be blunt.  Travis are/were a bunch of whiny little shits. I particularly hate the song "Why Does It Always Rain On Me" which seems to embody everything that is weak and poor about the indie rock genre.  It is sung in a downbeat, whining, pathetic vocal style.  It features blokes playing guitars with a minimum of effort, ooh, let's just strum a bit that sounds nice. Well no it bloody doesn't, it sounds like you never got beyond grade 2 in guitar lessons at primary school.

And then there's the lyrics...

"Why does it always rain on me,
is it because I lied when I was seventeen."

Grow some balls man, get a spine.  Of all the things in the world you could have chosen to write about, you chose drizzle. What the hell is wrong with you ?  This is music for middle class students without a girlfriend who have skived off their afternoon lecture to sit in the rain-streaked window of the local greasy spoon feeling sorry for themselves..  And you haven't got a girlfriend because all the cool guys were listening to Rage Against The Machines' Battle of Los Angeles. 

This is the sort of semi-rock pap that Absolute Radio clog up their airwaves with.  Harmless, inoffensive, innocuous, easy-listening bullshit.  Music that's played because hardly anyone in the listening masses will be affronted or upset by it.  Well I am upset, and not only because Absolute play the same tired old half-rock crap over and over again. I'm upset that anyone could write drivel like this, I'm upset that people bought it when there were a hundred other, better, albums they could have spent their money on.  It upsets me that people will settle for third or fourth best, that they won't step outside their aural comfort zones to actively search for something more stimulating.  And Travis, they're stimulating like Ovaltine.

Do you know why AC/DC are still playing headlining stadium tours and Travis don't ? It's because AC/DC do songs about drinking and sex and living life at a hundred and ten miles an hour.  If ever once Brian Johnson had said "I wan't to do a song about condensation" then Angus Young would have bludgeoned him to death and exhumed the corpse of Bon Scott, wired it to the mains and let it be the frontman for the next tour.

This is mentioned on Wikipedia - "When Travis started to perform this song at the 1999 Glastonbury Festival, after being sunny for several hours, it began to rain exactly when the first line was sung." This is because even God hates Travis, and he wants them to stop singing.


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1 comment:

  1. R,I.P,12:31 am

    Oh! come on Mike, this is not like you. Why are you holding back. Say what you really thinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkkkk (oops sorry, nearly spilled my Merlot then :) about Travis.
    BTW - what do you think about the Smiths?

    PS Enjoyed your ramble blog re the Leeds/Liverpool canal. Oh, the memories of teenage years 30 years ago, spent around there. Must come back and do it again

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