A man goes into the doctors for a penis extension.
The Doctor suggests a baby elephants trunk stitched on for £3000, to which the man agrees.
Six weeks later while having dinner with his new girlfriend he feels an unusual stirring in his pants and thinks 'This is the night!'.
While chatting over dinner his knob flies out, steals some fruit from the table and goes back.
"Wow!" she says, "Can you do that again?".
He says "My knob can, but I don't think my arse can take another apple".