Saturday, August 02, 2008

Happy Belated Yorkshire Day

Some Yorkshire make them work, you have to read them in a Yorkshire accent, if you don't know what a Yorkshire accent sounds like, then there's no hope for you.....

A bloke goes into a garage.
“Can of BP,” he says.
“No,” says the assistant. “But a goldfish can fart.”

A bloke goes to the vets.
“Vet,” he says. “It’s about my cat.”
“Is it a tom?” asks the vet.
“No, I’ve brought it with me.”

Two women were outside a jewellers looking at diamond rings.
One says, “There’s the one I’d get.”
And a Cyclops kicks her head in.

So they go into the shop and the assistant says, “(chew…chew…chew) Can I help you?”
“Yes,” says the woman. “I’d like to know about that ring.”
“(chew…chew…chew) What would you like to know?”
“Eighteen carat?”
“(chew…chew…chew) No I’m chewing gum.”

In a Barnsley keep fit class the instructor says “Hand on thighs.”
And they all went (cover your eyes with your hands).

(Thanks to The Lurker)

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